I am on family leave right now from work as to prevent any germs from entering our house prior to Myla's surgery. This feels weird. I get to sleep a little later, stay in comfortable clothes for most of the day, and spend an amazing amount of time with my wife and daughter. It has all of the symbols of winter break or summer with none of the sentiment. It almost feels like the days before my dissertation defense or my licensing exam, but the acknowledgment at the end holds a lot more meaning.
Myla's surgery is imminent. Its very real right now. Lindsey and I go hours without mentioning it, and then one of us has a random question about our hospital stay or Myla's recovery. Lindsey is nesting. She cleaned the house this weekend. She has watered the plants, cleaned up Pearl's #2s from our little backyard. Maybe she unconsciously views this as a rebirth. Our dear friends Bobby and Tovah have established a mealtrain account for us and we are overwhelmed with the love and support that we have gotten on there. Its quite amazing.
Tonight is also the first night of Hanukkah. This is Myla's first Hanukkah and will be an extremely special one. Tonight we will light candles, say the prayers, and exchange presents. We will do this again tomorrow night. I am not sure what the following nights will hold for us. We have been told that Thursday we will be in the Cardiac Intensive Care Unit (CICU), and Myla will be in what's called a "Pod." We saw the Pod's over the summer. It is a larger open area with four hospital beds and constantly has nurses and doctors circulating. We will get a "sleep" room and Lindsey and I will rotate being bedside in the rocking chair. I will bring a book. There can be at most, 3 visitors (including mom and dad) at all times in this unit. If all goes well, Myla will be transferred to the step-down Cardiac Care Unit the next day. Here, we hope to have a private room where we can set up a shop for the next few days. We have bottled water, books, a computer, and hopefully a lot of positive news to sustain us. Plus, there is an amazing Hershey's Ice Cream station downstairs where we can drink frequent milkshakes. If, you ever find yourself at CHOP (which I hope none of you do), make sure you get a chocolate milkshake from downstairs.
This blog seems a bit disjointed, but perhaps that is how I feel right now. I will be updating the blog during/after Myla's surgery on Thursday. Our little girl is so strong and so brave and so damn happy.
It's two days away but think about four days from now....four months from now....four years from now...these agonizing two days will seem like seconds, a snapshot of your beautiful daughter's life. A life that will be filled with smiles, giggles, whispers, laughter, joy...some headaches because, well she is a girl and we know how those teenage years go...and most importantly..it will be a life time filled with health. Her little heart will have just a tiny bit extra room to be filled with love. The doctors will make her little heart perfect on Thursday but those little open spaces she has had for the last 7 months have allowed more love into her life than most receive in a lifetime. Myla is a blessing to your lives and know that you and Linds are blessings in all of ours. Love you guys.
ReplyDeleteWow, Carla. I wish I could have said all of that. You put into words what all of us feel. How beautiful! Thank you.
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